Wedding Wednesdays: Traditions

Yesterday I posed this question to The Boy:

Me: "Hey, do you wanna wear fun socks with your tux? It's apparently a thing." (and I sent him a link to prove it's thing-ness)

The Boy: "No no no no no no. Black socks go with black suits!"

I kinda pictured him reacting like this:

I quickly backed off before I broke him. We clearly like our traditions in the Soon-to-Be-Valentine household.

Don't get me wrong - I'm all about traditions: I make my family watch the same movie every Christmas, I put the ornaments on the tree in a specific order, we eat certain meals on certain holidays, there are ALWAYS spinach tarts at Thanksgiving...you get the point.

I, however, also like trends. But I like them when they serve a purpose, not just because they're trendy. For example: I adore mason jars, and I'm planning on using them ALL OVER THE PLACE at my wedding. Not because Pinterest says they're cool, but because they remind me of my childhood.

Fun socks, however, is apparently a trend we are NOT embracing. Sweet Boy.

The conversation did get me thinking about other trends & traditions we're incorporating or jettisoning for Our Day. I did a quick Google search on "wedding traditions," to see where we ranked on the Traditional-to-Crazy Hipster scale.


I discovered several things as a result of this search:

1. While people aren't huge fans of the bouquet toss, they HATE the garter toss. Hate it. A lot.
2. Apparently I'm anti-feminist for wanting Daddy to walk me down the aisle (whelp, might as well take away my shoes and stick me in a kitchen...wait...I really wouldn't mind that so much...)
3. We're selfish for wanting other people to be in our wedding and for registering...um...wait, what?
4. The Internet is a sad, jaded place that needs a hug and a glass of sweet tea (see 2 & 3 above)
5. The British are ABSOLUTELY INSANE. Did you know they believe that finding a spider (yes, SPIDER) on your dress is GOOD luck?!? I'd have to burn down the chapel. NOT okay, Britain. NOT. OKAY.

I also discovered that we're somewhere in the middle on the aforementioned scale (that's like the second $5 word I've used today...go me). We're keeping most of the "big" traditions, eliminating some less necessary ones, and going semi-hipster with the feel (according to this infographic).

In case you're curious, here's a quick run down of what you can expect to see or not see at the wedding:

We WILL be doing:

• Something Old, New, Borrowed, and Blue: I think it's sweet (and I already have stuff in mind)
• Bouquet & Garter Tosses: Yes, you will be forced to endure these. I've had to, so do you. Mwa-ha-ha. Besides, it's not all bad, y'all. After all, I do give my Little Sister's excellent aim a little bit of credit for my current predicament. (Also, I really enjoy the contrast between the girls fighting for the bouquet and the boys AVOIDING THE GARTER AT ALL COSTS)
• Cutting the Cake: I paid a lot for that cake (ok, Daddy paid a lot for the cake). Either way, it was expensive and y'all are gonna come watch me cut it. Then everyone has to eat some. I don't care about your New Years Resolutions. Plan in advance - "No sweets except Alana's Wedding Cake" See? Easy.
• First Dances: Yes. Several. But then y'all get to dance, too! So everyone wins!
• Toasts: If the bridal party feels so inclined. Daddy will. Everyone bring tissue. 

We WON'T be doing:

• Not Seeing Each Other Before The Wedding: If you've ever been around me when I'm planning a party, you know I get a bit...twirly. I'll need a hug from The Boy (Momma calls him the Alana Whisperer) to calm me down. And I want sunset pictures. So yeah, we're skipping that one - bad luck be darned. 
• Unity Candle (or Unity Anything): Once I get to my "spot" at the front, I'm not movin' 'til it's over. I have an overwhelming propensity to trip over air...not gonna risk it. We're going with that whole ceremony thing being the "unity" bit.
• Bridal March: I will not walk up the aisle to a song when the only lyrics I know to it involve the words "fat and wide." Nope. Not gonna happen. Switchin' that one up.
• Receiving Line: No. They make me nervous. And they're boring to stand in. I just don't want to. I'll hug y'all later. 
• Cake Smooshing: Again, we paid a lot for that cake. I also paid a lot for my makeup. I want to enjoy both. No smooshing (yes, that's a technical term). 
• And the previously mentioned "way-too-colorful" socks.

Now you know what to come prepared to deal with. I can promise you, that despite the garter tossing and exclusive starter dances there will be good food, good cake, good drink, good music, tons of good company - and a huge (non-receiving line) hug from me if you show up. 

So come on out. Can't wait to celebrate with y'all!