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Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Vocation

My ninth grade English teacher was (and still is) one of the most influential people in my life. On the very first day of high school, I walked into his room expecting a typical "read this, write this, summarize this" English class. Instead, he stands up, stares at us, picks up a chair, puts it on the table at the front of the room, and says, "What is this?"

Student A: Um...it's a chair.
Coach: Oh really? What makes you say that?
Student A: ...'cause that's what it IS.
Coach: Well, how do you know that?
Student A: ...'cause...that's what a chair is! It's a chair.
Coach: Ok. What's a chair?
Student B: It's something you sit on.
Coach: (sitting on Student B's desk) So, this (points to desk) is a chair?
Student B: No. This is a desk.
Coach: Why?
Student B: Um...I don't know?

Then he walked to the board and wrote two words on it:


I was hooked.

The rest of the class was devoted to defining those words and discussing their implications on our lives. How they affect the decisions we make, the lives we lead, the people we become. How we define the world around us.

I can remember that day from high school with scary clarity. The type of chair he used, where I was sitting, the color of Coach's bow tie. From that first day to the day I graduated, that man didn't stop surprising me or pushing me to know more. To try harder. To be better. He shaped the way I viewed academics and how I defined goals for myself.

He taught us another word that day.


That's not a word you hear in your run-of-the-mill, everyday conversation. And I think that's a tragedy. In short, it means "calling," but the way Coach described it was so much deeper. It's a divine calling - our ultimate purpose. It's what we are designed by an almighty, all knowing God to do with our oh so brief time on this earth.

Now at that point, I was convinced my calling was to be a pediatrician. Over the next four years it changed about twelve times. Then several more in college. And, honestly, I struggled with it a lot last year. I love doing what I do, don't get me wrong. I have a fantastic job and I work with some of the most amazing people, and I don't plan on leaving them any time soon.

But, I'm realizing...it's not my ultimate calling.

Being a wife and mother, however, is.

The strengths I have, my personality, the things and people I'm drawn to...the things that make me the happiest - they all point back to that. I realize it may not happen for a long time, but I see glimpses of it in day to day life that just make me giddy.

Like tonight. The Boy started a new job today. He worked all day long and I'm sure was exhausted by the time he left the office. Knowing today was going to be a long one, I wanted to make sure we had a nice dinner and time to relax after work. I put most of it together last night because I knew I'd be at work all day and I wanted everything to be ready so that when he walked, in all he had to do was enjoy being home.

Sure I was exhausted last night, but being able to love on someone made it all worth it. I was happier prepping food and cleaning the kitchen last night than I ever will be with a six-figure income. That may not make sense to everyone, but I don't really care. If you know what you're called to do, you'll get it. If you don't, I can only hope and pray you find what you're looking for. 'Cause trust me, when you do, it makes all the difference in the world.  

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